We all have the need to be loved and give love, it’s built into us as human beings.
However, situations and events can make us fear giving love and reject love coming toward us.
It can play out in very different scenarios, such as choosing to focus your attention on the unavailable, like the married person or the unatainable like someone who themselves cannot love.
You can go through your life believing that you just attract the wrong partner, when actually it is you stopping love, through the belief in your mind that heartbreak is far less frightening than falling in love.
You get so used to this pattern that you become addicted to hearbreak, just like you would be addicted to alcohol or drugs.
Your mind and body crave the same scenario.
When you feel pain, anger, love or sadness, certain chemicals are triggered in your brain which create a specific composition and your body gets used to that feeling, just like it would when you have, for example, an opioid. Remember our bodies and minds are habit forming. So even if the situation makes you feel absolutely awful, you will continue to play it out because your body is addicted to the chemical reaction. And everytime you go for the unavailable partner, your mind reiterates the story that you are not worthy of love.
So in actual fact Kurt Cobain was 100% correct when he said “I feel the comfort in being sad”
Well this can be changed:
Affirmations - repeat everyday that you are worthy of love.
Heart Chakra - do heart opening chakra meditations daily.
Gratitude Journal - write down all you are grateful for on a daily basis
Manifestation - write down your ideal partner, a real wish list, go crazy, be extravagant, ask for the best because this is your life to create after all. Remember to list the important traits such as kindness, compassionate, well balanced emotionally and mentally.
Therapy - to really understand when you created the fear of love and work on changing this internal belief system and the addiction to the heartbreak scenario.
Love is truly the most incredible emotion we can feel, none of us were placed on this planet to walk alone. We should all have someone that can walk with us, laugh with us, dance with us, cry with us, support us and hold us in unconditional love.
For more info on this subject and to book a online session contact me on info@gailweiner.com