top of page
  • Writer's pictureGail Weiner

Cleaning out my closet - Forgiveness and letting go

When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and break free.

— Katherine Ponder

Forgiveness is often defined as an individual, voluntary internal process of letting go of feelings and thoughts of resentment, bitterness, anger, and the need for vengeance and retribution toward someone or a group of people who we believe has wronged us.

It can be difficult to forgive but so important, it’s not about the other person, it is about yourself. When we don’t forgive, we carry the emotion with us wherever we go. It tags along behind us, tainting our aura, our heart and our mind. Sometimes it can turn us bitter, distrustful and afraid of other people. It can even destroy the possibility of future relationships.

So how do we really go about forgiving someone?

Firstly, note that when you forgive it does not mean you allow yourself to be treated badly and nor does this give permission for the other person to reenter your life.

You do not need or want that person to be present when you forgive, their physical form does not need to ever hear you say the word forgiveness.

Forgiveness is for you, it is your personal journey, so you can move on in peace, and with no anger, resentment or risidual energy left behind.


First of all you need to accept that everyone enters your life for a reason and there is a lesson with each encontour, understand the lessson and accept what you have learned.

In many cases, when we think back we only feel the pain and anger towards the person but if we delve deeper we can also discover that they were one of our teachers. They came to us with some of our most difficult life lessons, that left us battered and bruised, but they taught us and helped us grow.


Acknowledge that no one is inherently evil and that we all have our own path to follow and karmic debt to repay. Acknowledge that we are all at different stages of our soul journey.


Understand the reasons why this person might have hurt you, they have their own pain and life story, which caused them to choose do the things they have done.


With understanding and acknowledging their journey, make peace with the fact that what they did to you was because of who they are and their life story and not who you were then or who you are now.

This is an important part of the process

Forgiveness ritual:

When you are ready

Take a few deep breaths in and out

Create a white light of love energy around you to protect your space

Imagine the person in front of you

Say to them (using their name)

I accept who your are, acknowledge your path and understand you have your own journey in life to learn and follow

I make peace with the pain you have caused me and in healing myself, I give anything I might still carry of this pain back to you, it is no more mine to carry

I forgive you and let this pain go

I forgive you and accept who you are

I forgive you and let this go with love and understanding

I let you go in peace

I forgive you

With forgiveness, we allow ourselves to grow, heal, reduce stress and gain compassion for others.

Most of all we allow ourselves to open up to new possibilities with trust and an open heart

For more on this topic or to book a session contact me at

448 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All


bottom of page