Imagine we lived in a world where we understood that people come into our lives with blessings, laugher and love and that these same people need to leave when the time is right. That we are fortunate to experience these interactions which might last a few hours, a few months, years or even decades but they then need to move on to continue their adventures, just as you need to do the same. These encounters change us, they teach us lessons about ourselves, about emotions and the ability to love. Most of all when people leave us, it teaches us the graceful art of letting go. Letting go with love.
Letting go is difficult, we are hardwired to hang on tight to whatever makes us feel good, even when the time is over, we cling as hard as we possibly can. We blame ourselves for not being good enough and we scorn the other for being cruel and heartless in letting us feel such immense pain. The place that once held so much love and laughter now becomes a battle ground.
It’s important for us to understand and respect each individual’s journey. We have been given the gift of this life, to explore and move through an incredible magical adventure. Each of us has unique needs and as we move, our journey evolves. We meet people who help us navigate, leading us to the places we need to be in order to continue our journey, sometimes that’s all they are supposed to do, lead us somewhere, they are not meant to stay. Other times, we are the ones who need to help someone find their place and once we have shown them, then we need to go. We cannot linger, no matter how much we want to, we can feel in our core that it is time to move. As hard as we try, we will be pushed to travel on. In many cases, we do not listen, we stay, we persuade, we fight, we say we can make it better, usually we are pressed to our limits until we have no choice but to leave with our claw marks edged onto the ground. Other times we just remain, sad but desperate to not let go. We wait for the situation to become like it once was, full of hope and happiness but it never does. Time passes and we find ourselves stuck in someone else’s journey and not living our own. This is the worst place to be, nothing happens here. It is a wasteland of unrealized dreams.
Learning to know when to leave applies to relationships, careers, friendships and locations. If we all understood that it’s the natural flow for everything to change, just like the seasons do, the same as the ocean moves from high tide to low, the same for us, we have to let go with love. Allow the other person to continue their journey, kiss each other one last time and wish them well on this incredible ride. Thank your current job for all it has taught you and allow yourself to move forward with no regrets. Let go of the city you have lived for decades, move to the place that is now calling your name. Leaving does not mean you don’t care, it means that you understand the importance of movement, the importance of continuing your enchanted journey and allowing others to do the same.
Some tips on letting go; acknowledge the other person, listen and find the compassion to understand why they need to move on. Understand that your time together was important for this phase in your life and that you have taught each other what you need from this time. Accept that with each goodbye, new space is created to allow different adventures into your life. Trust that the process is exactly how it should be. Feel the pain, allow yourself to mourn the loss of your loved one, companion, friend, place or job. Hold space for the grief and be gentle on yourself. Plan what you will be doing next, and most of all let it go with love in your heart. Embrace what is to come with open heart and mind.
Creating connections is a gift, experiences are our life offerings, allow them to come and allow them to leave.